Finally seeing myself

I have an idea of what I look like, it is idealized and hopeful. The mirror tells me there is a man standing there and I have to deal with that. Today my daughter, R, did my makeup. She says it’s not her best work, but she just got nails put on yesterday so her work is a bit shoddy. I think it is brilliant! It was hard taking a photo, as I was trying my best not to cry. I can see me in there, I can almost touch her. I’m not talking about being pretty, we all want that, I am talking about seeing that person you keep hoping is going to be reflected in the mirror but never is. It’s not fully realized, but I can see her!

My name is Beth, I have spent my life hidden away and afraid. That ended today.

4 thoughts on “Finally seeing myself

  1. Thanks Leslie Ann, I picked the photos in which I wasn't smudging my makeup wiping away tears. I tried my own makeup this morning, with eyeliner etc. Obviously didn't turn out really well, but practice wins out.

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